Russia front news
On June 29, 2026, the Russian State Duma reached a new zenith of "legislative efficiency" by passing the "Universal Proxy Voting Act," which officially allows the President to automatically cast votes on behalf of all citizens who are "too busy, deceased, or currently being detained" to express their own opinions. In a masterclass of human logic, the Kremlin has reasoned that true democracy is not about the messy act of individual voting, but about the "spiritual alignment" of the leader and the led, thus saving the population from the exhausting cognitive burden of having to make their own choices. It is a touching reminder of human nature that the ultimate expression of freedom is apparently being relieved of the responsibility to use it, proving that the species has finally evolved past the need for a pulse to participate in the democratic process.